“Keep your eyes forward, Mr. Laydon,” the nuns used to say back when I was in grammar school. Once you heard this, you didn’t dare look anywhere else.
Boy, were we afraid of those nuns. They used to tell us that our parents signed a paper that gave them permission to hit us if we were bad. I don’t know if it was true or not but every once in a while we would get a whack from a ruler and we sure didn’t run to our parents crying because we probably would have gotten another one when we got home. Ahh… the good old days!
How was I, just a mere child with raw knuckles, to know back then that those nuns were, probably unknowingly, giving me some pretty good life advice?
Why was it those nuns were so interested in me looking forward?
Probably because all of the important stuff was going on in front of me – in the front of the class – and if I was looking backwards I might have missed it.
I have found that this idea of keeping your eyes forward has come in very handy in many circumstances. It is definitely very important when driving a car. How can you successfully navigate traffic and not crash if your eyes are always in the rearview mirror looking at where you have been and what has already happened behind you instead of where you are going?
Life is no different.
How can you successfully navigate through life without keeping your eyes focused on what’s in front of you?
Too many people get stuck looking at the past. Too many people get stuck on what has happened and not on what is going to happen.
Some people live in the past either like the things that have happened to them are some badge of honor or falling back on the past to explain their inability to move forward today. But while they keep looking to the past, the present is flying by them like a high-speed train.
While looking to the past and reliving memories can be fun and enjoyable, being stuck in the past can be truly harmful.
Many people have had hard times and hurt in their past.
When people’s life experiences start to hinder them emotionally, sometimes others refer to this as someone having “baggage.” While I don’t particularly care for the idea of calling someone’s life experiences – good or bad – “baggage”, sometimes, those hurtful life experiences can weigh one down like they are carrying a heavy bag and hinder a person’s ability to live their life now.
Even in the Bible, David asks the following: “How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?” Psalm 13:2
In some cases, the negative past experiences build up like lint in a drier. Every time we dry something in the clothes drier a little bit of lint gets trapped in the filter. Eventually, after many cycles, the lint can build up to a level where the drier can’t function properly. In extreme cases, if we don’t work to clear out the lint, a destructive fire could start. We need to clean out the lint filter of our lives before we get to the point that the fire ignites.
I am not saying we should ignore the past; however, we should try to learn from it and use it to move forward successfully in our lives.
“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” Isaiah 43:18-19
Sometimes I like to think of the past as if it were like that nun from grammar school – just waiting with a ruler to whack me on the knuckles again… “Eyes forward Mr. Laydon”…
Share with us: Is there something in your past holding you back or have you overcome something in your past that was holding you back?
Sometimes I find myself being very angry about my child hood,even though my parents did the best they could I feared them more than anything else. They loved me but we could never really attach,I just don’t want my children to fear me but to love me,as I love them no matter what.
you know… its kinda funny… you think you are looking ahead and without realizing it- something happens in your life that brings some things from the past to the forefront of your thoughts. Brings insecurities that you thought had long been overcome. I guess we become vulnerable and that in itself is kinda scarey but kind of exciting at the same time. I like the things you say… makes me realize that to move forward… I need to let go of the past once and for all. I am starting to realize… i never actually overcame past hurts… i just built a wall around them and pretended they did not exist. I need to check old ‘baggage’ at the door… look forward… and never look back… Eyes forward ms jeanie…
btw… i love the marquee message… at the top of the site
Baggage is a pretty good visual metaphor…we may need to up-pack that baggage: unlock it, unzip it, open up each compartment, and let the light of the Lord illuminate it and reveal what needs to be uncovered, so that it CAN be unpacked, and HE can cleanse it all, and we can put the memories on the shelf, and allow ourselves to travel light. Because that baggage is not going to empty itself, and it only gets more filthy as time passes, if we do not approach it and take care of it with the Lord at our side. Then we are free to focus the eyes of our heart and be fully attentive as we look ahead to the new thing he is doing…for He is our passport to all the things he has planned for our future.
Today, your post hit home.. I go to court on the 3rd of Dec. for divorce. Tears well up in my eyes and I don’t know how to move forward. I truly do feel like David. I feel like a child curled up in God’s lap asking Him to hold me cause I can’t feel Him. It is 25 yrs of my life that just seems to fill me full of hurt and mental anguish. I read your post everyday and it gives me hope and inspires me to seek God. Thank you for that. I keep tryin to run but to no avail.. I keep ending up right back where I started. How do I even begin?
So close to home.. My son was killed and the holiday’s are so so hard. I can’t go forward its so hard. I my thoughts are I could have been there I should not sent him there, but i know that god has taken him to a better place. I can’t think straight most of time and I can’t keep crying to people they think i’m just using it for a escape. I pray I Pray I pray I want his soul to rest. i can’t move forward.. please pray for me………… I love your post’s
it helps a lot Thank You
Hola Brenda Dios te Bendiga, soy madre y nunca he tenido una experiencia como la tuya y le pido al senor que nunca la tenga, pues todas las madres nunca estamos preparadas para una situacion como la que has tenido que pasar, pero si tengo unos amigos que le asesinaron un hijo de 18 anos, fue un momento muy dificil que nunca quisiera recordar, quiero decirte que esa madre perdono a la persona que asesino a su hijo, en muy corto tiempo, ella se ha dedicado su vida al senor, para el padre no ha sido nada facil ya han pasado 3 anos y el sigue igual de dolor y sin perdon, incluso a traicionado a su esposa, el no esta en el camino del senor, esa senora a pasado no solo por la perdida de su hijo sino que tambien por la traicion de su esposo y se ha mantenido firme en la palabra de dios, pues su hijo en el momento que murio, estaba muy activo en la iglesia, mientras que el resto de la familia no, ella tuvo un sueno a los pocos dias de perder su hijo, que el dia mismo que me conto el sueno despues estaba estudiando en la biblia y el senr me llevo hasta Apocalipsis 3-8 al 11, si lo lees, ese fue el exacto sueno que ella tuvo, el senor confirmo que ese muchacho murio porque el lo permitio para salvacion, busca de Dios, confia en su palabra no se mueve ni una hoja en un arbol si el no lo permite, orare por ti, y trata de poder orar tu tambien, habla con Dios como si estuvieras hablando con tu amigo mas intimo, pues el es tu amigo mas intimo, dile que no puedes con el dolor y que necesitas que te preste tu corazon porque con el tuyo no puedes, ten mucha fe y veras como todo va a ser diferente, quisiera volver a saber de ti, Dios te Bendiga mucho. Amen.
i to get stuck in the past. i loved your article, it is hard to let the past go but we have to let go and let God
Man, talk about hearing Him! This has really touched home with me and my current situation. I can’t describe what this has validated for me in words. I didn’t think I would be able to hear Him and today He spoke to me through this article. I’ve asked the question in Psalms 13:2. Even today I thought of that very question. I’m facing a major trial in my life to where I felt that I would be better off not even being here. I know that is the wrong way to think. I must look forward! God is good and I shall praise Him for all the good and all the bad. I will not allow this to ruin who I am. I will raise up, learn from my current situation and be grateful for all His blessings! Wow!! He is AWESOME! I have joy in my heart! I am forgetting former things and I will not dwell on the past!!! Glory be to God! Thank you much! I was drawn to this article and I’m glad that I was!
It’s harder than it should be for me to let go of past hurts and disappointments — and as hard as I try — I slip back, even though I tell myself I am so fortunate to really have so much in my life overall…the thoughts still play over and over like a broken record sometimes — like they have a mind f their own. The idea that doing that is like always looking in a rearview mirror and not really driving the car — and maybe even crashing the car because you are fixated on what’s behind you… this is a very powerful image for me. Even though I know this myself, and tell myself this same thing over and over, sometimes a visual is very powerful….a powerful “default” thought to refer to when you find yourself heading in the wrong direction yet again. i am going to conjure that image up the next time I am replaying the bad stuff and feeling a little lost and sad. Thank you.
A rhema word is always relevant ! This article was published last year yet it has pricked my heart to 7/1/2010. I am like everyone else life has dealt me hurt some I am having difficulty letting go . But what is ringing in my mind is the metaphor of the nun and ruler and her telling you to look forward . Thank you for that example I will remember that for the rest of my life. Looking back can cause you to a) Not see the beauty of what life has for me b) I can crash and burn because I did not see the obstacles before me . C) I will never make it to my destination because I can not follow the path set before me . WOW !!! I am dealing with a loss of a relationship and although it hurts i must let him go with the understanding that what God has for me it for me . I do not have to fight to keep it or beg for him to see the beauty that I possess . Thank you so much for sharing your insight !
I am the same way looking back to the past for comfort, when you really can’t find comfort from a past that was hurtful. I have to learn to let go and let God take care of my burdens and past! I loved the articl! Thanks!!