I am sure that everyone, at one time in their life, has experienced being hurt by another person. Most times the hurt comes from a breach of trust that we have placed in someone close to us: someone steals from us, marital infidelity, divorce, and physical abuse are some of those breaches.
Being hurt by someone close to us can generate some very strong emotions; unfortunately, the emotions that being hurt generates are negative ones. Anger, betrayal, sadness, and other feelings similar to these are entirely normal reactions to the hurt.
While these are normal reactions, what is not normal is allowing these feelings to consume you to the point where they become unhealthy, affect your attitude, or cause you to cease being able to enjoy life.
As devastating as the effect that being hurt can be, I believe it is crucial to try to find a way to maintain a healthy attitude, move forward in life, and not let any negative emotions that might result from the hurt rule you.
Getting over the hurt takes some time. It is similar to coping with the death of a loved one. When someone that is close to you dies you need time to grieve – to let go. Once the grieving period is over it is time to begin the healing process.
For someone who is dealing with significant emotional pain caused by being hurt, first they must grieve for the breach and loss of trust. After that, the healing that needs to take place begins. And this healing starts with a choice: choosing not to live in the negative but rather letting go of the negative feelings and moving on.
How do you break that tie and free yourself? How do you move on past the hurt?
You must choose forgiveness. You must truly choose to forgive the person that has hurt you for the actions they have taken that has led to the hurt.
By forgiving, we do not change things that have already happened to us. Through forgiveness we can certainly change our outlook on life and how we envision our future.
There is a saying with regard to our attitude: life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it. While being hurt by someone close to us can be quite a traumatic experience, our reaction to it can be changed from one that can rule our life with negative emotions to one that is more healthy for us.
The ability to forgive is a very freeing quality.
The greatest effect that someone hurting you can have is that their actions bind you to that person forever unless you learn how to break the emotional tie that the hurt creates. You easily can become a slave to the emotions that are created by the hurt.
Sometimes we make a choice not to have the people who have been hurtful to us in our lives any longer . However, the emotional ties that bind you to this person may linger much longer than does the actual relationship to the person.
Through forgiveness you cut the ties that bind you to the person that has hurt you. Forgiveness allows you to take control. Forgiveness allows you to be in charge of the situation rather than the situation being in charge of you.
Choose forgiveness and choose freedom.